Overwhelmed Mom: The Year I Cried Myself to Sleep every night

Someone somewhere needs to hear this... cuz no matter the stage you're in, parenting can be FRUSTRATING!

Years ago, when I had 3 little kids - I mean we're talking a 4 year old, 2.5 year old, a 1 year old and I was expecting my fourth - I literally cried myself to sleep every single night.

We had just moved out of state, away from family for the promise of a new position for my husband at work, which fell through after only 3 months. He then found another position in another state and as we couldn't move in the middle of the pregnancy and school year (and couldn't imagine moving again!!), I stayed and he commuted.

I was sick as anything with morning sickness. Could hardly keep anything down. Could hardly drag myself out of bed in the morning. I don't know how I managed to get the older two out to preschool in the morning, and then I spent the rest of the morning running after my very active 1 year old.

By the time it was time for her nap, the older two were home already and it was time to entertain them.... or rather run after them and clean up the trail.

My oldest had sensory issues galore and was always seeking sensory input - in the form of touch just about everything in sight, water, flour, mud, noodles, and if he didn't find it he would make it!

He also couldn't stay put for more than two seconds and was always running somewhere, and of course his two sisters followed him everywhere.

I couldn't exactly stay in our 2 bedroom apartment all day so we'd go to the park.... and they'd run away..... and it would take me an hour to catch them (and I'd have to embarrass myself by asking some passersby to help me).

Or we’d go to the library.... and they'd jump around dancing and singing.... and we’d get up kicked out of the library....
so I'd try to round them up and lock them in their car seats so we could leave...

Or we'd play in the yard in front of our apartment.... and they'd run in three directions....

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I could literally not get them to bed at night. One would climb the book case. The other one would climb up the bunkbed and then jump off. The other one was always check the front door and the sliding door to see if she could escape. I think it took me 2 to 3 hours every single night to finally get them asleep.

Keep Going

No matter how frustrated you are or stuck you feel. No matter how bad things are right now. No matter how many days you’ve spent crying and wishing things were different. I promise you won’t feel this way forever. KEEP GOING. Someday they’ll grow up and be the best part of your life.

And then I'd collapse on the couch and have a good hard, long cry.

I couldn't. I literally couldn't. And the bigger my tummy got, the crazier and the wilder they got, and the faster they could run.

My husband couldn't find a job in town for over a year and aside from the 3 weeks he worked from home when our daughter was born, I was alone all week and only had his help on the weekends.

To say that I was an overwhelmed mom is such an understatement! I felt like I couldn't go on. I was tired. No - I was exhausted. I was depressed. I was alone. Things felt hopeless.

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I honestly look back and I don't know how I survived.

What I know is that I just kept telling myself over and over again that this stage will pass. It will get better. I've just got to KEEP GOING!

And you know what? Those 4 kids are now 19, 17, 16 and 14. They are the best part of my life. They are witty, confident, helpful, thoughtful and so much fun to be around.

And I can't imagine my life without them.

My kids (minus my oldest son who’s away at school) - best part of my life!

Yes, I have four more as well. And yes, I love them just as much, even though they're still in the growing up, drive mommy crazy stage. But life is oh so different than back when I was such an overwhelmed mom - the year I cried myself to sleep every night.

If this is speaking to you - if you are an overwhelmed mom or dad - I feel for you. I've been there. Whether it's a baby or child who won't sleep or wild and crazy kids, or a child who is violent and being sent out of school - trust me I've been through all of these. I hear your pain - and I know it's real.

KEEP STRONG, my friend. And I promise, you won't feel this way forever.

And don't hesitate to reach out if you need help. I'm here for you.